JOKES AND SHAAYRI

khusboo mein ehsaas hota hai
pyar ka rishta khaas hota hai
har baat ko zuban se kehna munkin nahin.
iss liye pyaar ka naam
vishwaas hota hai
there r some times
when we hav to stop loving someone,
not bcoz we start hating them,
but coz we realise that
they wud be much happier if we let them go

oniya: Mila mujhe mera pyar aisa ki usne mujhe sab kuchbhula diya Meri routi hui duniya ko usnefir se hasna sikha diya Milne ke baad uskomeri ummid ki kiran jal uthi Khushi mannmein aate hi meri aansuon kid dor tutt gayi,Pehle to meri har khwaish tutt gayi thiekin ab mere dher sare sapno ki line fir selag gayi thi, Ab jee chahta hai ki har sapnapoora ho jaye Usse milna kahi yeh sapna bhi adhura na reh jaye, Mujhe nahi pata tha ke yehkhushiyan bhi hai bas ek hi pal ki Mujhenahi pata tha ke yeh baatein reh jayegi beetekal ki Lekin ab main apna dil nahi harungi,Apne sapno ki duniya khud hi sajaungiDil mein chahe ho lakh dukh lekin hansi merechehre pe hard um dikhegi Mere sapno kiduniya ab kisi aur ke haathon nahi bikegi

NEEV: AF - Always friend
BF - Boy friend
CF - Close friend
DF - Dear friend
EF - Ever friend
FF - Forever friend
GF - girl friend
HF - Helping friend
IF - Innocent friend
JF - Jovial friend
KF - Kind friend
LF - Lovely friend
MF - Merry friend
NF - Naught friend
OF - Only friend
PF - Personal friend
QF - Quiet friend
RF - Rare friend
SF - Special friend
TF - Thick friend
UF - Understanding friend
VF - Valuable friend
WF - Wonderful friend
XF - Xcellent friend
YF - Youth friend
ZF - Zeal friend


Meaning of F.R.I.E.N.D.S.H.I.P
F" is for Fun............That friends share when they are together.
"R" is for Reliability....A true friend is someone that you can always rely on.
"I" is for Interest.......Someone who is genuinely interested in you, your fears, joys, and life.
"E" is for Energy.........They pick you up when you are down, and give you the energy to go on and believe in yourself.
"N" is for Nothing........Nothing is ever too much, no matter what time it is, night or day.
"D" is for Distance.......Although the miles may separate you, a true friend is never far away.
"S" is for Secrets........Your feelings and personal/private thoughts that you can only share with a friend.
"H" is for Happiness......The way I feel when we are together.
"I" is for Inseparable....Through good time
Scrap 2 All Friends in 1 Minute...Click Here

NEEV: Gam me hasne valo ko kabhi rulaya nahi jata,Lehro se pani ko hataya nahi jata,Hone vale ho jate hain khud hi dil se apne,kisiko kehkar apna banaya nahi jata.=========================================Ye rishte bhi ajeeb hote hain,sab apne apne naseeb hote hain,rehte hain jo nigaho se dur wohi dil ke kareeb hote hain.=========================================Sapno se dil lagane ki aadat nahi rahi,har waqt muskurane ki aadat nahi rahi,yeh soch ke ki koi manane nahi aayega,ab hamein ruth jane ki aadat bhi nahi rahi.=========================================Kismat jab likhi to khuda so gaya,jisko bhi jaan se jyada chaha wo juda ho gaya,dard sahe hai is dil ne itne ki,ab to dil se dard ka ehsaas hi kho gaya.=========================================Chale ao hum yad karte hain,yeh gunah hum bar bar karte hain,jala ke chirag hasratoonka dil mein,terey aane ka intezar karte hain.========================================



haatho ki lakeero pe kabhi vishwaas nahi karna,kyoki takdeer to unki bhi hoti hai jinke haath nahi hote.
2. dreams r not d ones u see when u sleep,but r those which never let u sleep till they r achieved.
3.the happiest people dont hav everything in life,they just make the best of everything that comes their way.
4.there r times when we hav to stop loving someone,not bcoz we start hating them,but coz we realise that they wud be much happier if we let them go


: OFFICER: WHAT IS YOUR NAME?
CANDIDATE: M P. SIR
OFFICER: TELL ME PROPERLY
CANDIDATE: MOHAN PAL SIR
OFFICER: YOUR FATHER'S NAME?
CANDIDATE: M P. SIR
OFFICER: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
CANDIDATE: MANMOHAN PAL SIR
OFFICER: YOUR NATIVE PLACE
CANDIDATE: M P. SIR
OFFICER: IS IT MADHYA PRADESH?
CANDIDATE: NO, MANI PAL SIR
OFFICER: WHAT IS YOUR QUALIFICATION?
CANDIDATE: M P. SIR
OFFICER: (ANGRILY) WHAT IS IT?
CANDIDATE: METRIC PASS
OFFICER: WHY DO YOU NEED A JOB?
CANDIDATE: M P. SIR
OFFICER: AND WHAT DOSE THAT MEANS?
CANDIDATE: MONEY PROBLEM SIR
OFFICER: DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY
CANDIDATE: M P. SIR
OFFICER: EXPLAIN YOURSELF CLEARLY
CANDIDATE: MAGNANIMOUS PERSONALITY SIR
OFFICER: THIS DISCUSSION IS NOWHERE, YOU MAY GO NOW
CANDIDATE: M P. SIR
OFFICER: WHAT IS IT NOW
CANDIDATE: MY PERFORMANCE...
OFFICER: M P!!!!
CANDIDATE: WHAT IS THAT SIR
OFFICER: MENTALLY PUNCTURED......

khubsoorat hain woh lubjo pyari batein kartey hain
khubsoorat hai woh muskurahatjo doosron ke chehron per bhi muskan saja de
khubsoorat hai woh diljo kisi ke dard ko samjheyjo kisi ke dard mein tadpey
khubsoorat hain woh jazbatjo kisi ka ehsaas karein
khubsoorat hai woh ehsaasjo kisi ke dard me dawa baney
khubsoorat hain woh bateinjo kisi ka dil na dukhaein
khubsoorat hain woh ankheinjin mein pakezgi hosharm o haya ho
khubsoorat hain woh ansoojo kisi ke dard ko mehsoos kerke beh jae
khubsoorat hain woh Hathjo kisi ko mushkil waqat mein tham lein
khubsoorat hain woh kadamjo kisi ki madad ke liyeaagey badhein !!!!!
khubsoorat hai woh sochjo kisi ke liye acha sochey
khubsoorat hai woh insanjis ko KHUDA ne yekhubsoorati ada ki. ................


Four guys1 from Harward:1 Oxford1 Texas&a Sardar from Punjab university
1 common question:What is the fastest thing in world?
Oxford:LightHarvard:ThoughtTexas:Blink of an eyeSardar:It’s loose motions,because last night I was lying in my bed& before I could blink,think or turn on the lights,it was over!


jane kyu ache din jaldi beet jate haijane kyu ache din waapas nahi aate haihum khwabo ko sanjone mai puri zindagi laga dete haiaur jane kyu wo ek pal mai hi tut kar bikhar jate hai


Ek Vada Tha Tere Har Vade Ke pichheTu Milegi Mujhe Har Darwaze Ke pichhePar Tu Mujhe Ruswa Kar GayiEk Tu Hi Na Thi Mere Janaze Ke piche
Ladki Boli :
Ek Vada Tha Mera Har Vade Ke PichheMai Milungi Tumhe Har Darwaze Ke PichhePar Tune Hi Mud Ke Na DekhaEk Aur Janaza Tha Tere Janaze Ke Pichhe

positive thinging..............
a little bird flying in the sky
comes to u and hit in your eye
u dont tear u dont cry
u simply smile and thans god
that cows dont fly

jab thaaro sms aave hai
to maare ang ang maa gudgudi hove sai..
oooooo ooooo ooooji yo tharo kasoor koni
kambakth mobile hi vibration pe hove hai

husband &wife r 2 wheels of a whicle
every knows ............
if one wheel get punchered
than whicle can not run
so.... wise person must carry a stepany for emergency.

LADKIYON KI KAHANI:
If v treat her nice she says "yaar mujhe line de raha hai"If v dont she says "kitna akarta hai"If v dress nicely she says "mujhe impress karna chahta hai"
If v dont she says "tasteless hai yaar"If v argue with her she says "ziddi hai"If v sit quietly she says "dumb hai"If v act smarter she'll lose her brain as u r insulting herIf she acts smarter she thinks its her rightIf v dont love her she says "is ka to pehle se hi 2,3 ladkiyon ka saath chakkar hai"If v love her she says "peechhe hi pad gayaa hai"If v dont tell her ur prob she says " u r not honest 2 me"If u do tell to her she says "u r a problem child"If v scold her she says "you act like a grandpa giving lecture"If she scolds us she says "Yaar, its becoz i care"If v break a promise she says "She does not trust u any more"If she breaks she says "jaan main majboor thi....ladkiyan re ladkiya . .bechare boys itna sab sehke b chup chap rehte hai



Idhar khuda hai, udar khuda hai,
jidar dekho udar khuda hai,
idhar-udhar bus khuda hi khuda hai
jidhar nahi khuda hai....udhar kal khudega!

Tumko dekha.....to yeh khayal aaya
tumko dekha....to yeh khayal aaya
paaglon ke stock mein naya maal aaya!

tere dar pe sanam hazar baar aayenge,
tere dar pe sanam hazar baar aayenge.....
ghanti bajayenge aur bhaag jayenge !!

He: Janeman, is dil mein chali aao
She: Sandal nikaloon kya!
He: Pagli, ye mandir nahi hai, aise hi aajao...
Mere marne ke baad mere doston,
yu aansoo na bahana,
Agar meri yaad aaye to,
sidhe upar chale aana!!

Kehte hain ki ISHQ main neend ud jaati hai
Koi humse bhi ishq kare
Khambhaqat neend bahut aati hai!!

Tumsa koi dusara jameen par hua
to rab se sikayat hogi....
Ek to jehlla nahi jata
dusra aa gaya to kya halat hogi!!!

laloo-are o doctorva
ee kasi nasbandi kiye ho
rabri phir se maa banne wali hai..?????
doctor nasbandi hum tohaar kiye hu
pure bihar ki naahi..........

in a sardar s garment shop
customer_ bhai saab underwear dikhana
sardaar_aaj pahna nahi hai......

hamaari aankhon me aansoo aaye na hote
agar tum pichhe dekh kar muskuraye na hote
tumhare jaane ke baad ranj ho rha hai
kaas tum jindgi me aaye na hote........

agar etni hasin ho to
khud ko duniya ki nazron se bchaaya karo
aur aankhon me kaajal ke saath saath
gle me nimboo mirchi bhi latkaaya karo...ok.

ahsaan jaano hmaara
jo hum tumhe etni siddat se
chhahte hai email karte hai
vrnaa hum to vo saks hai jo
khwabo me bhi badi minnto se aate hai

WHO SAID ENGLISH IS SO EASY?
FILL THIS BLANK WITH YES OR NO
1.________i dont have a brain
2.________i dont have sense
3.________i am stupid
Dur nigaho se jaya na karo
dil ko is kadar tadpaya na karo .tum bin hum ek pal bhi na ji sakenge
ye ehsas bar bar dilaya na karo……………
2men lukng 4theirlost wifs1st how urwife luklike2nd 5.8 36-24-32fair bold blue eyes2nd wht abt urs?1st meri nu chhd chl teri lbiye...